Honestly, if you never had the most hectic time in your life that you can ever imagine, i strongly encourage you to join mechanical engineering in Monash University. Here's what we have in store for you...
Monday-
last day to catch a breath before the week begins.
Tuesday-
Mechanics exam which you decide to study your ass off cause it's so freaking hard and you choose to memorize all the useless equations you've ever come upon in your life. At the moment of truth, you step into the exam hall with your head aching and your palms sweaty from flipping the pages of your newly worn out text book,
your teacher says " ok so this test is two questions and they are both the same questions you've done in your tutorial. so if you did it it'll be easy for you, if you didn't then this will be very new to you"
ahh... the class cheers..
and laura says " Fu@#(&$(&#)*$^)*)$^KKK"
cause she realizes that the very question he chose was the question i chose so happily to ignore. life is good.
Wednesday-
Dynamics exam. Ah mechanics was easy. Dynamics should be fine... plus there's not much to study. Moment of truth once again. As the light A4 paper flips from it's front revealing our first task, we say........."holy sh..........."
conclusion- Dynamics-FAIL... excellent :)
Thursday-
Mathematics exam. Got good tips. finally. a lift off my shoulder. did okay for the exam.. felt so proud of myself.. but you know how when you step out of the exam hall people like to talk and discuss about the exam...then you find out what you did right and what you did wrong... yeah... i strongly ask you NOT to partake in ANY of this conversations...
They break your heart..
seriously.
Friday-
Dynamics tutorial due. Awesome. i come to uni at 8:00 am in order to get parking which was already about seven to eight rows from the front? awesome. yeaps. Anyways, so it's a one question tutorial. How hard can it be? FOUR kafreaking(i quote M) HOURS later... and many bundles of hair gone.. it's done... WRONG... but done.. who cares anymore? Project is due tomoro. so we start at the project lab fixing our 40% project.. STRESS.. 5:30 pm.. project lab closes.. we migrate out to the corridor to finish our work.. 7:30pm.. breaking point of our lives.. and our project... it's 12:01 am: the project continues in klang. thanks Mr. A.... Mangbena. awesome.
Saturday-
a new day shall begin soon. lets hope for the best....
and expect the worst..
so my dearly beloved friends. Monash university is a highly established well known and fabulous university for the young and the stressless. I hope to see you soon. You know what they say.. the more the merrier. :)
you found it. you stole it. you confessed it. you won it. you broke it. you never gave it back.
Friday, April 24, 2009
Monday, March 9, 2009
anoth-ER
i didn't wanna do it. but i was just so suprise you change it first. now the world knows. single.
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Iko-there's nothing more
so i wake up everyday to go to uni.. or to go out.. and i put it on.. those pieces of metal.. each meaning something special to me.. one was given by an old best friend.. one was given by my grandmother.. one was given by me to you.. and i took all three and gave it to you...
but now it's back with me.. and i feel like it protects me.. and somehow.. everytime i have it.. i will never see you or accidentally bump into you.. the day i chose to be forgetful and those very pieces of metal that gives me courage was left untouched on my bedside table.. that day.. i see you... and that day... i was unprotected.. unshielded.. exposed.. and every bone and muscle in my body ached as i could only see what my eyes could see.. and yes... i believed you too... and yes.. you'd see it someday too.. but i didn't think i'd be the first one to see it... three times i passed by... just to make sure it's you.. maybe my eyes were playing games... and the fourth time.. you werent there anymore... but in front of me... and with strength i walk away.. but at the edge of escape.. i crumble... only to myself and not to the world.. only to find out that there's two? and another one, where something else happened? i mean why would you say not that one from there if you werent afraid i knew something... ppl ask me how did i.. how did i at first.. i said i dont know.. it was different.. you were different.. now i just wonder..
if love was just blind?
.
.
but now it's back with me.. and i feel like it protects me.. and somehow.. everytime i have it.. i will never see you or accidentally bump into you.. the day i chose to be forgetful and those very pieces of metal that gives me courage was left untouched on my bedside table.. that day.. i see you... and that day... i was unprotected.. unshielded.. exposed.. and every bone and muscle in my body ached as i could only see what my eyes could see.. and yes... i believed you too... and yes.. you'd see it someday too.. but i didn't think i'd be the first one to see it... three times i passed by... just to make sure it's you.. maybe my eyes were playing games... and the fourth time.. you werent there anymore... but in front of me... and with strength i walk away.. but at the edge of escape.. i crumble... only to myself and not to the world.. only to find out that there's two? and another one, where something else happened? i mean why would you say not that one from there if you werent afraid i knew something... ppl ask me how did i.. how did i at first.. i said i dont know.. it was different.. you were different.. now i just wonder..
if love was just blind?
.
.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
From Afar
okay so my blog has been depressing. again. but i can't help feeling this way. But anyways, courtesy of the Ceylonese i'm now reading a book called "The Secret".. hmm. it's like a book on positive thinking and how it relates to quantum physics and The Laws Of Attractions. Basically is was proven that centuries ago, greatest conquerers, artists, musicians.. discovered "The Secret" and they've been using it for ages to succeed in life. So What Is It??? Its basically how your universe revolves around your thoughts alone and every negative thought you think of becomes reality due to the Laws Of attraction. Well, long story short, It's time we stop saying "i dont think i can do it" and start saying "Bring it on. I can do it". Somehow today out of this week, was the first time i belch out in loud laughter for so long.. it's that laughter which i long awaited.. and this was just the sprinkle of flour in my cookie dough... I'm just waiting and anticipating that one laughter.. that one moment which i had before.. where i can laugh and smile and be soo soo happy and appreciatte everything around me... that one moment i lost.. that one moment i want to last a lifetime... well.. with my new quest of "the secret"..
i say.. I Will Find It.
Okay so uni started and i've been trying for the past 2 hours to upload pictures to make my blog seem less dull and depressing but i can't seem to let it load.. well yeah. today was a hectic day.. partially a waste of time and partially fun.. You see.. explain to me how productive it is to go for a 1 hour lecture from 8-9am and another 1 hour lecture from 2-3pm.. yeaps.. i had a 5 hour break in between.. filled with asam laksa, AnW waffle, ping pong, darts and just plain bumming..
Can i tell you how downright sad it is to just have 2 freaking weeks of holiday and come back 3 kgs heavier?? i mean come on. Talk about unfair when you see those "skinny bitches" (in mich's words) eating like a shit load of food and desserts and not putting on a single pound whereelse I on the other hand, choose only certain days to binge and indulge out of the whole month, and I end up like a bloated cow on a day of bad gas. I mean seriously. My Metabolism rate should be like close to 0 or something. Oh let me tell you that i found out my health is pretty screwed up and out of the month of January i had to go to the doctor like 4 times. Twice for blood tests, once for sugar level test and lastly for antibodies jab.. And I of all people.. am TERriFied of needles.. well i guess u have to when you find out that the count of antibodies you have is 10. So you then ask the doctor calmly.. "what's the normal count for antibodies in a person?" and he says "1000?"
..... and for two seconds you think to yourself.. "HOLY FFFFFFFFFFFFishsteaksnpepperonis... Jab me. Jab me NOW!" Well..on a positive note.. i'm glad to say the count is back on track and i'm On my way to a healthy lifestyle..
i dont know why i'm so hyper but i'm just typing out everything i feel and everything i've missed out on. i guess i miss the times where i can just express myself without feeling sad or guilty or getting questioned and ACCUSSEd the next day. I just need a breather and right now it seems like reality has been waving it's green ticks at me screaming CHECK CHECK CHECK for far too long and from now on i gotta start TRYing to get back up on my own feet. Well for those that dont know.. if you're blur enough not to notice how saddening my blog has been lately.. i think i've fallen into a deep case of depression and denial.. haha. as i always say "i'm in denial of myself"... and i can choose to put a smile on my face and pretend everything is fine and then cry to myself when i'm sad or i can choose to focus on the more positive things in life and try to move on.. ever since november last year my life has been going down the drain more and more each day.. it seemed like a stream flowing down it's path to the Waterfall.. well.. i can choose to acknowledge these issues and also to pray and know that everything will be alright in the hands of The Mighty One.
On a second, third, forth? note... The Watchmen... what a movie.. well.. i wont say it's damn good and i wont say it's damn bad but all i can say is HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.... honestly... you have to watch it to understand me.. i laughed so damn loud in the cinema you have no idea... OH THE STUPIDITY.... aih... Twisties. Thanks :)
Lastly, i've given up meat and chocolates for the month of lent so please wish me luck.. i've got 40 days to go and i'm dying each moment... some can't live without their rice.. their chicken and beef... but honestly.. i can't live without my chocolates.. This is the first time since Nov that i havent eaten chocolate everyday okay.. now that is BAd... so yeah.. wish me luck..
anyways. i'll try to upload the pictures when i can. bye all. :)
If you Judge people, you will have no time to Love them - Mother Theresa
.
i say.. I Will Find It.
Okay so uni started and i've been trying for the past 2 hours to upload pictures to make my blog seem less dull and depressing but i can't seem to let it load.. well yeah. today was a hectic day.. partially a waste of time and partially fun.. You see.. explain to me how productive it is to go for a 1 hour lecture from 8-9am and another 1 hour lecture from 2-3pm.. yeaps.. i had a 5 hour break in between.. filled with asam laksa, AnW waffle, ping pong, darts and just plain bumming..
Can i tell you how downright sad it is to just have 2 freaking weeks of holiday and come back 3 kgs heavier?? i mean come on. Talk about unfair when you see those "skinny bitches" (in mich's words) eating like a shit load of food and desserts and not putting on a single pound whereelse I on the other hand, choose only certain days to binge and indulge out of the whole month, and I end up like a bloated cow on a day of bad gas. I mean seriously. My Metabolism rate should be like close to 0 or something. Oh let me tell you that i found out my health is pretty screwed up and out of the month of January i had to go to the doctor like 4 times. Twice for blood tests, once for sugar level test and lastly for antibodies jab.. And I of all people.. am TERriFied of needles.. well i guess u have to when you find out that the count of antibodies you have is 10. So you then ask the doctor calmly.. "what's the normal count for antibodies in a person?" and he says "1000?"
..... and for two seconds you think to yourself.. "HOLY FFFFFFFFFFFFishsteaksnpepperonis... Jab me. Jab me NOW!" Well..on a positive note.. i'm glad to say the count is back on track and i'm On my way to a healthy lifestyle..
i dont know why i'm so hyper but i'm just typing out everything i feel and everything i've missed out on. i guess i miss the times where i can just express myself without feeling sad or guilty or getting questioned and ACCUSSEd the next day. I just need a breather and right now it seems like reality has been waving it's green ticks at me screaming CHECK CHECK CHECK for far too long and from now on i gotta start TRYing to get back up on my own feet. Well for those that dont know.. if you're blur enough not to notice how saddening my blog has been lately.. i think i've fallen into a deep case of depression and denial.. haha. as i always say "i'm in denial of myself"... and i can choose to put a smile on my face and pretend everything is fine and then cry to myself when i'm sad or i can choose to focus on the more positive things in life and try to move on.. ever since november last year my life has been going down the drain more and more each day.. it seemed like a stream flowing down it's path to the Waterfall.. well.. i can choose to acknowledge these issues and also to pray and know that everything will be alright in the hands of The Mighty One.
On a second, third, forth? note... The Watchmen... what a movie.. well.. i wont say it's damn good and i wont say it's damn bad but all i can say is HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.... honestly... you have to watch it to understand me.. i laughed so damn loud in the cinema you have no idea... OH THE STUPIDITY.... aih... Twisties. Thanks :)
Lastly, i've given up meat and chocolates for the month of lent so please wish me luck.. i've got 40 days to go and i'm dying each moment... some can't live without their rice.. their chicken and beef... but honestly.. i can't live without my chocolates.. This is the first time since Nov that i havent eaten chocolate everyday okay.. now that is BAd... so yeah.. wish me luck..
anyways. i'll try to upload the pictures when i can. bye all. :)
If you Judge people, you will have no time to Love them - Mother Theresa
.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
sometimes
oh my gosh. you fucking asshole. i can't believe what you said.all this time ok we fought but not once have a told anyone the things you told me and you dare... you DARE tell what i told you??? and to use it against me???? to fucking ruin what i have?? is that what you were trying to accomplish?? oh my gosh.. please la k..no one is perfect.. no one is ever happy with everything okay.. people quarrel... you dared to use that? hah!!!!! you're the one to talk.. boy oh boy do i have much to tell the world if i wanted to... but no.. i am not stooping down to your pathetic level... and your embarrassing excuse for everything... what else you got to say huh?? bring it on baybeh... cause you know what.. i dont care... i'll start by telling the world... yes.. i was screwed up... yes i made a whole lot of mistakes... yes i bitched about a lot of things... but you know what... i'm telling the world now too that i'm changing.. and i'm gonna be a better person someday... you can stick to your ways and stick to your sneaking around.. manipulating words and backstabbing... but i'll change... and someday i pray and hope you do too...
happy valentines day. has a ring to it doesn't it?
.
i think of the moon and the image comes back to me.
its glow lightening up the sky and the smiles of my friends below.
the silence awakens my senses and the waves restores my peace.
and yet the water drips not at the soles of my feet but at the bridges of my cheeks.
with just one message i feel the ache again.
and i think maybe it's time to unlock the chains around my heart
but i just can't find the key.
and i push away every soul that comes near it.
like the beast guarding the gates of hell
i unleash my anger on those that try to enter.
not because of hatred but of fear.
and deep behind those walls the brows of guilt slowly emerges.
and i feel pathetically sorry for my very soul and sorry for those around me
for in the words of the wise "i know not what i do" nor what i say anymore
life has become a whirlpool on it's own
a toy to the evil and to grief upon by the mighty.
my hero left unspoken of and my enemy in power.
and all i can do is whisper an apology to you
and return with frustration and anger.
sometimes.
sometimes
sometimes.
life goes on. with or without you.
-lj
thanks for being there for me. budweiser :)
thanks for the poem. Dr. Love
thanks for caring. JsQ.
thanks for the messages. sisley.
thanks for the talk. starbucks.
thanks for the time and words. sushi.
thanks for smile. eurasian.
thanks for the years. paramore.
thanks for everything. oreo cheese. coo coo :)
life's just so damn good isn't it? well.. on the brighter side.. i just had chocolates :)
happy valentines day. has a ring to it doesn't it?
.
i think of the moon and the image comes back to me.
its glow lightening up the sky and the smiles of my friends below.
the silence awakens my senses and the waves restores my peace.
and yet the water drips not at the soles of my feet but at the bridges of my cheeks.
with just one message i feel the ache again.
and i think maybe it's time to unlock the chains around my heart
but i just can't find the key.
and i push away every soul that comes near it.
like the beast guarding the gates of hell
i unleash my anger on those that try to enter.
not because of hatred but of fear.
and deep behind those walls the brows of guilt slowly emerges.
and i feel pathetically sorry for my very soul and sorry for those around me
for in the words of the wise "i know not what i do" nor what i say anymore
life has become a whirlpool on it's own
a toy to the evil and to grief upon by the mighty.
my hero left unspoken of and my enemy in power.
and all i can do is whisper an apology to you
and return with frustration and anger.
sometimes.
sometimes
sometimes.
life goes on. with or without you.
-lj
Happy valentines day to all of my friends.
near or far. before or now.
to all.
to all.
thanks for being there for me. budweiser :)
thanks for the poem. Dr. Love
thanks for caring. JsQ.
thanks for the messages. sisley.
thanks for the talk. starbucks.
thanks for the time and words. sushi.
thanks for smile. eurasian.
thanks for the years. paramore.
thanks for everything. oreo cheese. coo coo :)
life's just so damn good isn't it? well.. on the brighter side.. i just had chocolates :)
Saturday, February 7, 2009
haahahahaha
you know what the funny thing is
i actually thought it was about me
and i actually went
pfft,. i'm a fool
.
.
and it really wasn't a cross
i actually thought it was about me
and i actually went
pfft,. i'm a fool
.
.
and it really wasn't a cross
Monday, February 2, 2009
undefined twist of the lips
its pace is slow
it creeps without a glow
inch by inch it grows
ever patient as i watch it subside
with all my might i try
but it's hard to comply
to something so simple yet
seems so impossible
to grasp with might
yet yearning to release
and with all this i still try
yet i fail again
it's there he says
but it's empty
hollow like the very soul itself
gone until it sees again
what it once knew
blinded by the world
they come ever willingly
not giving up
yet not knowing what their actions do
again i say
inch by inch it grows
i tell myself everyday
yet i dont see it
they dont see it
i can't believe i thought it would
where is it
i want it
i need it
i wish it were real
the undefined twist of the tainted lips
the smile i once knew
-lj
it creeps without a glow
inch by inch it grows
ever patient as i watch it subside
with all my might i try
but it's hard to comply
to something so simple yet
seems so impossible
to grasp with might
yet yearning to release
and with all this i still try
yet i fail again
it's there he says
but it's empty
hollow like the very soul itself
gone until it sees again
what it once knew
blinded by the world
they come ever willingly
not giving up
yet not knowing what their actions do
again i say
inch by inch it grows
i tell myself everyday
yet i dont see it
they dont see it
i can't believe i thought it would
where is it
i want it
i need it
i wish it were real
the undefined twist of the tainted lips
the smile i once knew
-lj
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